shannanigans if you pull my card, you pull the ace, and if you ask me turn UP the bass

not much of a post

yes yes, haven’t written anything.

whatever.

i updated my portfolio a little, scroll all the way down to see the newer stuff.

click me

the basics of the site aren’t changed and yes, i have all my grammatical error still in there, erica. plus, the welcome page is the same as before. i’ll change it once i getz aroundz to it.

i thought of all these clever funny tidbits to write in here, but now i can’t remember any of them. the only thing i have to say is that i killed a fly tonight and it was awesome. i was like lightning! it wouldn’t land and kept flying around the room. one of my biggest pet peeves is flies inside rooms without direct outside outlets, so it was pissing me off. i knew my only chance was to just hit it in mid-air to stun it then follow-up and smash the little jerk. i think a large part of me doubted my skills, but the other part of me was all “no ways, we’re super lucky!”

and we were.

it was so cool, i saw him coming out of the corner of my eye (most of my eye was focused on the television) and it was like some sort of animalistic hunting instinct kicked in, i flicked the double headed fly swatter (double headed because our fly swatter is two fly swatters masking-taped together for durability and strength) and SHAZAM! he was on the floor! i whacked that sucker one more time for good measure and wiped up his guts with a kleenex.

my room was once again at peace. perhaps that wasn’t an exciting story for you, but you didn’t feel the adrenaline pumping! ahh, the exciting life of a non-athlete. it really is the simple things, you know?

anyway, the perseid meteor shower is in its peak this weekend so i’m going to try and see that now and climb up on the garage. it’s about midnight here. if i don’t post in say, 2 months then you know i fell off the roof.

nevermind, it’s raining.

hello? is this thing on?

i painted today!

yeah, i don’t know what came over me. i was driving home from surfing with marie, and i just felt like painting. i forgot how long it takes to paint something and how much patience/steady hand movement it takes. so, i’m probably not going to paint again for a long time. because now i remember.

so, it’s 7/7/07. wooooooo! i don’t know, i don’t think i feel any luckier. i wasn’t even invited to my cousin’s wedding. or any wedding.

what else…..i had this horrible dream where i was trying to watch the singing bee (new tv show) and don’t forget the words (also new tv show which seems like the same idea) at the same time to see which one was better to watch. when i woke up i was so mad because i realized i just dreamed about watching tv. seriously, a waste of a dream. i was so pissed at my brain for its lack of creativity. i mean, come on! it’s a friggin dream for goodness sake! it can be ANYTHING and i dream about tv? wtf.

this entry kinda sucks. damn.

these songs are bananas!

i was looking through the computer and going through old garageband songs that i named funny things but couldn’t remember what they were. most of them turned out to be just ‘hot beatz’ that i’d made but never gone through with using and wanted to save. i did, however, run across this hilarious song that i forgot i even made. it was back in the early days when i’d just discovered all the neato things my computer could do.

dear victoria (that bitch)

maybe it’s one of those you had to be there things. even though it was only me who was there. so um, inside joke with myself?

here’s another ongoing project i have

the counting song

whenever i have nothing to do/decide to procrastinate for a very long time, i find songs to add on to this master mix i’m creating. why? because i love songs with counting in them. LOVE them.

as much as i love songs with clapping in them.

why yes, more awesome, please

Where the Red Fern Grows
By Wilson Rawls

The book I read takes place in the Cherokee Ozarks. I know that because the book says where the story takes place. It seems like the time is around the time of the Summer of the Monkeys book, because it is around that time when people still go hunting with dogs, still own small farms, and have a town where richer people live.

This book would be very different if it took place in Las Vegas, Nevada, and the time was now. The boy, (named Billy) probably wouldn’t have dogs. Also he definitely wouldn’t go coon hunting. his parents would be in the hotel business, instead of the farming business. Instead of roaming the trails by the river, Billy would be roaming around hte hotels on the “Strip” (a street with lots of hotels on it in Las Vegas). His grandpa might be running a casino, not a general store, and giving Billy money, not candy.

In short, the story would be a totally different story if the time and setting changed. You couldn’t really call the book Where the Red Fern Grows, unless the fern grew in Las Vegas, where someone would trample, smash or run over the sacred fern.

Now I know how important the time and setting are in a book. Otherwise the book’s plot would change drastically.

you: well, shannon, that’s a nice little piece, but perhaps is there a more opinionated piece written by a fifth grader i could read? why, of course there is!

The Giver
By Lois Lowry

I think that The Giver is a kind of boring book. I feel that it didn’t really deserve to win a Newbery medal, because it is a little too unrealistic and boring.

I consider it unrealistic since the people in the story are so perfect, and I think that we could never be that perfect no matter how far into the future we could be. After all, we’re only humans, not robots. I also think that just one person can’t hold all the memories of the past and no one has memories. The author was probably using her imagination a lot in the book.

It was a boring book because it droned on and on and had almost no excitement. I think that it had some parts that didn’t need to be in the story.

I think that this book shouldn’t have gotten the Newbery medal. I guess the people who choose the award winner didn’t think it was boring. I guess they thought the author was using their imagination. This is only my opinion and other people will probably say something different.

man, i like this kid already.

how’d you get all of that in dem jeans?

it’s monday, memorial day, so the whole family’s home. everyone’s doing their own thing, listening to their own music. my brother’s playing trance music in his room, i’m playing all my recent downloads in my room and my mom’s playing…dr. laura. yes, she listens to that. that and a lot of other talk radio. we got her and ipod nano, (which she adorably refers to as her “nano-pod” and is still trying to figure out how to work fully—in fact, just recently she accused me of leaving her nano-pod on, causing it to die when really it was on the ‘hold’ switch) and all the music she puts on it is korean soap opera soundtracks. i know right, and that’s her workout music. so, she’s outside with my dad, cleaning her car before it becomes her ex-car on tuesday and the dr. laura’s playing. it’s pretty loud and i’ve moved to the kitchen to eat a sandwich so i can’t help but tune in an ear. this lady calls in and starts saying whatever her problem is and i just happen to hear the end of it. it goes something like:

….and she was standing there and wearing these LOW RIDER jeans and exposing eight percent of her derriere!!!!

the woman was apparently very distressed that someone was dressing this way and wanted to find out from dr. laura how to make them dress classier. i didn’t listen to the answer, but i assume it was one of those ‘you’re an idiot, call me when you have a real problem’ answers. i got a little too lost in thinking that one, if you’re going to describe something with a percent, you should make it a little more accurate. eight percent is not a lot. really. even of an ass. i don’t even think eight percent reaches the crack. and two, “eight percent of your derriere” would make an AMAZING rap song. i mean, think about it.

here is a rough chorus:

eight percent of your derriere
something something here to there
something about pants you wear
something something and i don’t care
only eight percent of your derriere
something something just ain’t fair
something something can’t help but stare
eight percent of your derriere
derr-i-ere (what?)
derr-i-ere (what?)

i think it’s perfect. i mean, it’s classy via use of a french word, smart via usage of a number and percent (such math!) but still, essentially, all about the ass.

i swear, some days it’s just like DAMN, i’m good.

ew

so last night was one of my more restless nights. i went to sleep early-ish, midnight or so yet i ended up getting a small amount of sleep because something was biting me. literally. all i remember is it was sort of a muggy night so i kind of kicked the covers off and rolled my pajama pants up. the next thing i knew i was scratching my legs like crazy, but i wasn’t completely awake, just in that half in half out phase of sleep so my brain wasn’t putting thoughts together. it was just saying “legs. itchy. scratch them.” not “hmm, why are my legs so itchy? why are there some itchy bumps on them? am i getting bitten by something?” so i was in and out of dreamland occasionally scratching and trying to find a more comfortable position.

my arms started getting itchy too so i was scratching them every so often. then i felt a small pinch on my arm and instinctively swatted the spot with my other hand. there was the tiniest crunch noise and THEN my brain woke up. it was gross. i knew there was blood on my fingers. MY blood, the blood of a pirate! it was very dark and i only had my phone to shed light on the situation. i didn’t have my glasses on so i couldn’t tell what the disgusting culprit was so i just went to the bathroom and washed it off.

after that, for the rest of the night i kept waking up and feeling itchy like i was getting bitten again and very paranoid. i guess that is what it’s like to be strung out on meth or something. well, without the strong compulsion to clean (that would have probably been an even busier night). i also spent much of the night wondering if i had lyme disease or some other horrible sickness.

bastard!

oh, the drama

so this morning, i did it again. i missed my alarm. it’s because i went to sleep around 2 when normally i go to sleep around 12 and my body’s gotten so used to that sleep cycle i’ve been able to wake up consistently 2 minutes or so before my alarm rings, which has been a wonderful thing. it’s very pleasant to wake up naturally.

this morning, i did wake up naturally….a half hour late. i woke up at 9:23 for a class that starts at 10 and normally i allow 20-30 minutes for the commute. i ran out at 9:40-something and sprinted over to the subway. i had a backpack and a rolled up poster in my hand and was feeling very very frantic. as i was running down the hall, i could hear the train, and people started streaming up the stairs; i knew they were coming from the train i needed. so, i dashed down the stairs and leaped over the bottom three (as one is wont to do in such a situation). the subway doors were about four feet to my right, and not in the direction my momentum was carrying me so i did a quick directional change (like you do in tag when you’re trying to fake out the person chasing you) and my feet flew out from under me! my right knee landed hard on the ground and JUST as i hit the ground i could see the doors closing. at this point, i was way too committed to my actions and the adrenaline was pumping (my brain said “unh-unh, no WAY this bitch is leaving sans moi) so i sprang up and shoved my arm in the door and threw the doors open again, safely entering the train.

now my knee is really sore and i’m definitely throwing these shoes out when i leave. zero. traction. who knows when i’m gonna have to catch a train next (or escape someone? or chase someone down?) i gotta be prepared.

i have been watching a LOT of csi online. it’s probably the reason for my lateness in the first place, but not really since i was only watching it as i worked. i’ve watched a lot of it. i don’t even want to say how much. but i would highly recommend season seven. like i told jess, i can’t even count the number of times i said “oh shit!” within the first seven episodes.

i’m going to go take care of the blunt force trauma to my knee now.

why do we do things that hurt? or rather, things we know are going to hurt. your brain completely understands it, the pain, the suffering, but what is that desire? i was thinking about this all today.

i was thinking about this sometimes today.

i wasn’t thinking about it this morning because this morning i put on the wrong sock. all of my socks were normal when i came back to new york. they were perfectly paired, like a good sock collection should be. all of them were the same, these generic white socks with grey toes and heels except for four pairs which are long fun socks. anyway, after the first washing (when something is most likely to go horribly wrong) i realized something was amiss. i found that all my socks did not pair up. well, they did but there was one sock that was wrong. it looked the same, sort of, white with grey toes and heel, but it wasn’t mine! the top of it—i dont’ know what that part of a sock is called, the tube maybe?—is different. it’s tighter weaving, not folded in the same way, it’s just different. and the inside of the sock! the inside! it’s SO wrong. it’s not soft like the others, it’s scratchy terry cloth and very very thin compared to the rest of my socks. anyway, i always try to avoid this sock because it makes one of my feet feel less loved than the other foot. today, i accidentally grabbed it and put it on. then i sat there for a good couple minutes debating whether i should take it off and replace it or not. i was trying to decide if the time and effort was worth it. in the end, i decided it was worth it because otherwise i’d start the day off on….

i swear, i didn’t know i was going to write that when i started the sentence.

anyway, back to what i was originally talking about. there’s something about seeing the subway arrive at the station that makes me want to give it a hi-five. it just seems like a really fun moment, where your relay teammate or something is coming in and you have to tag hands! except your teammate is a ten car train, and tagging it would really really hurt. my brain understands that this would hurt, but that doesn’t stop my heart from wanting to do it!

why?

it’s just like tonight. i did a lot of homework today, but i definitely have more. i mean, i don’t have time to “shit around” as they say. i did want to make sure that i watched the office tonight though, because hey, it’s the office and it’s thursday night tv. come on. i know after the office ends, that if i do not turn the tv off, i’m going to lose out on a lot of work time, yet i continue to jabba the hut in front of the fancy glowing box. why? it’s going to hurt later on, but i don’t care. incidentally, i just remembered a book the librarian at school read to us when we were little. it was about a bunch of sailors who found a magic glowing rock on an island and brought it back with them and they all got addicted to staring at it and eventually turned into monkeys. after the captain? got rid of the rock, they all returned to normal, except they all really liked bananas. anyway, the glowing rock was a not so sly metaphor for television. it was a good lesson and all, but i think if there was an animal you were going to turn into because of tv i don’t think it’d be a monkey. actually, i think you’d most likely turn into a rock. which is NOT an animal!

so ha!

una storia d’amore : sciare amore

a story of love : (to) ski love
written by shannon
translated from italian by shannon
with inspiration from jess

There was a girl named Francesca. Francesca was an intelligent girl, but she was not happy. She didn’t like anything. One day, Francesca’s friend said “We must go skiing! The Alps have new snow!” Francesca said “I don’t like skiing.” But, her friend said that she would give Francesca 50 Euro if she did not like skiing after their ski vacation. Francesca and her friend departed for their ski vacation.

While she was skiing, Francesca hurt herself. She broke her leg! Francesca went to the hospital. When her friend entered the room, Francesca said “Where are my Euro? I do not like skiing!” All day, Francesca was an ugly person. She said “I don’t like this, I don’t like that, etc.”

Suddenly, a loud voice said “I DO NOT LIKE SKIING!!!”. Another person entered Francesca’s room in a wheelchair. It was a boy who had also broken his leg. They greeted each other. His name was Nino. Nino was also an unhappy person. He and Francesca talked about all the things they did not like. They fell in love immediately.

Two or three years later, Nino and Francesca got married. At the wedding, Francesca was talking with her friend. She said “Here are the 50 Euro back. I do like skiing.”

Finito.

mo money, mo problems

i agree with biggie on a lot of stuff (for instance, please don’t shoot up the place, cause i see some ladies tonight that should be havin’ my baby, baby) but not this one. i bought printer ink today for 50 bucks. and that was the “deal” one that comes with photo paper. it was ridiculous. if you buy ink for your printer twice, you can buy a new printer already. i guess i’ll be printing 50 pictures before i go home, which isn’t even that far away. *idea! sell the 50 photos at $1 a piece!!! it totally wasn’t worth it because at the end of the year i have to junk everything. well, at least……i don’t know, there’s no really upside to that. at least i have ink? i’ll work on it.

when i went to buy the ink at staples, i went up to the counter, because that’s where they keep the ink because it is valuable. yeah, if i was gonna rob a staples, i really would just go for the ink. i mean, they’re small, individually wrapped, and oh so expensive. the other valuable stuff like printers are so bulky and the digital/computer stuff is all under lock-down in the cases. but the ink, yeah, the ink’s perfect. i mean, can i get an ‘eeeee-bay’? not that i was casing a staples or anything, but i had a lot of time as i stood there gaping at the prices. finally i decided on the pack that came with the paper as a bonus but the lady wouldn’t help me. i kept doing that leaning in/try to make eye contact because i’m ready to declare my purchase/question thing but she just kept calling next customer and all these people kept walking up out of nowhere. i’m not a dumbass, there were clearly no strap-ey line border things in sight, no velvet rope deal going on anywhere, yet still, i could not get some damn service up in that bitch. i kept looking behind me to see where the stream of people was coming from, but it wasn’t coming from anywhere. people were just floating in from all directions, i tried to line up behind someone who wasn’t even in line…..because there was no line! and no sign for a line either. it took me three circles of the general cash register area to finally get to the counter. that made me even more upset about having to spend money on ink.

so upset that i came home afterwards and bought songs off of itunes.

anyway, coming home i saw this, which is probably the best thing i’ve seen today:

and, it was free!