xin nian kuai le!
happy chinese (lunar) new year!
i would have posted last night, but i didn’t. i was busy cleaning the apartment which is tiny and gets dirty very fast. here is a chinese song because it is relevant, somewhat. it’s not about new year’s at all. it’s this poetic jay chou thing about i don’t know storms and relationships and wind. chinese pop may not be your thing, but too bloody bad for you! i happen to think it’s quite nice.
happy to report i’ve avoided most awkward things today. although, the other day i almost got hit by a biker. but i think it was his fault. he was all angry and yelley, but i didn’t really hear him because i was listening to music. i just kind of give him a blank stare like i didn’t understand english. sometimes i just do that, pretend i don’t understand english and stare vapidly at that middle forehead part of someone’s face. i also often pretend not to hear people when i’m walking down the street or on the train. i don’t know why, i just don’t feel like talking to them until after they try to ask me for directions 3+ times. then i whip around and take out my earphones and go “WHAAAAT?!” like i am so surprised. sometimes i’m a terrible actress, but sometimes i am pretty good.
did i ever write about the time that i had that damn korean quarter or whatever the hell it was and could not for the life of me get rid of it? yes, i, like almost everyone else in i don’t know where do not often check my change carefully. it’s too stressful because you’re standing there trying to get it all back in your wallet but the person behind you is wanting to order or whatever and there’s crumpled receipts that are blocking the bill part of your wallet so you’re smashing everything; this makes the wallet fatter so you can’t close it properly and you have to go in and fix everything which takes even longer and you’re starting to feel so embarrassed and ill prepared for life in general. anyway, one day i discovered that i had inherited a korean coin that was more or less the size and shape of a quarter. i was so pissed but i figured i’d just pass it off like canadian pennies (even though they are worth more now, aren’t they?). first i tried at starbucks, i was pretty sure no one would even notice, hell, i didn’t. although, i’ve found myself to not be very perceptive sometimes. so i give my money to the girl and feeling all agitated like you do when you’re lying to someone’s face and
her: um this isn’t…money
me: hmm?
her: this isn’t american money (gives coin back)
me: HHHHWWWHHAAAAAAAT????? (with that beginning ‘h’ sound like when some people say ‘white’)
her: um…yeah.
me: what ISSS this????
her: i dont’ know.
me: I’m so sorry! oh my goodness, someone’s cheated me!
me thinking: awwww fuck!
i tried it not once, not TWICE, but THREEEEE times and that damn bastard would always get recognized, even at the deli. THE DELI. now THE DELI is checking money? like they’re not the bastards who gave it to me in the first place??! that coin is still in my room somewhere, i gave up, or maybe i left it somewhere, i was so angry at it.
so now i’m out 25 cents and apparently still angry about it.
well now, if that’s not the most chinese thing ever, i don’t know what is.
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